The loss of a dream

I'm about to get incredibly real on you people right now. Bare with me...



Ever since I was about 6 years old, I've had the same dream; I was going to record a song with Prince, Janet Jackson, and Michael Jackson.

Growing up in music, singing my whole life in the choir, having my dad be one of the BIGGEST in Gospel music, I thought my life was paved in this path. However, today was a really hard day for me. With the passing of Michael Jackson, I found myself asking multiple times, "What am I going to do with myself??". Its a hard concept to grasp, for someone other than myself, as to why I'm taking this so hard but this was something that I looked forward to; something I dreamed and hoped would actually come true. If anything, Michael Jackson was THE ONE that made me believe anything was possible if you worked hard enough for it.


This guy worked and trained, and was practically "bred" for this industry. Hands down, there is no one greater. Dancing, performing, creating, improving. There are a lot of great people in the world but here's how I look at it: out of all the greats that have ever lived, how many people responded to them like they did Michael Jackson?? I mean, there are starving children in Africa; with no food, no television, clothes, or radio. But a GRIP of them know who Michael Jackson is. That's a true artist, a genuine Human Being, and Humanitarian.


Anyone who truly knows me know how much my heart goes out to the children of the world; fortunate or not. I don't know what it is but I know what I was put on this Earth for. I've known this since I was 6, about the same time I realized just how great MJJ was/is.

I was put on this Earth to be some form of connection between children and the world. A Missionary, a Teacher. Someone to help them strive for the best and to show them how amazing they really are. Through whatever format comes about, that's what I need to be doing and there's nothing that it going to hold me back from that.



Hopefully my Prince and Janet Jackson dream will still come true (I've kinda even molded my mind state and life in the image of Janet. I love her and she amazes me). We'll see how that goes because music is not my sole forte but it is something I've always dreamed. I plan to continue to work hard to make this happen and if it doesn't, Michael's passing has made me realize that maybe it just wasn't meant to be.



Love and cheers and prayers and blessings to you all.

August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009

Album of the Week

So, as some of you may know, at least once a week, I like to wake up uber early and run on the beach before/during sunrise. This was the album I rocked it out to while I was there this morning. Enjoy.

Earth Wind & Fire - That's the Way of the World

Released March 15, 1975

1. Shining Star
2. That's the Way of the World
3. Happy Feelin'
4. All About Love
5. Yearnin', Learnin'
6. Reasons
7. Africano
8. See the Light

Earth Wind & Fire is undoubtedly one of the best "bands" of all time. Every member was of the up most, top notch quality. Sometimes I get mad at them cause, 'fuck them, why not me??' Jaha! Til this day you can catch 'Reasons' or 'Shining Star' amongst a host of other top hits of theirs on the radio. This was their first album ever put out, got great reviews from the billboard charts and their music is obviously still around today. AMAZING!

I don't have to tell you all how good they are but I will say this, about 80% of the time, my house would not have been cleaned if I didn't have EW&F's records blaring from my phonograph. They put me in a super good mood. And that's that.

Shit I'm Rockin Wit This Weekend

Super excited for this weekend!! If you're in LA, you should check out these events. Click the pics/links for more info.



Fozzy's Hero. I will rep these boys til the end plus 5. Come check them out tomorrow night (Friday) at one of my favorite Valley venues, Webers Place. FH always puts on a show that you'd be stupid to miss. Good ass punk rock from some uber cool guys that def know how to crunk it. I'll be there, you should be there. Don't miss it.





So, my girl, Zebek, Hoe-ner of the iSCREAMgarbage empire, and her Garbage Girls will be at this event. Loves this girl too much. And Flea Market shopping is super fun. If you're into all that, check it out.

Album of the Week

It's baaaack. Let's get it.

2Pac - All Eyez On Me

Released February 13, 1996

Disk One
1. Ambitionz Az a Ridah
2. All About U
3. Skandalouz
4. Got My Mind Made Up
5. How Do You Want It
6. 2 of Amerikaz Most Wanted
7. No More Pain
8. Heartz of Men
9. Life Goes On
10. Only God Can Judge Me
11. Tradin War Stories
12. California Love [Remix]
13. I Ain't Mad at Cha
14. What'z Ya #


Disk Two
1. Can't C Me
2. Shorty Wanna Be a Thug
3. Holla at Me
4. Wonda Why They Call U
5. When We Ride
6. Thug Passion
7. Picture Me Rollin'
8. Check Out Time
9. Ratha Be Ya Nigga
10. All Eyez on Me
11. Run tha Streetz
12. Ain't Hard 2 Find
13. Heaven Ain't Hard 2 Find




I dedicate this album of the week to my boy, my Jap... This album reminds me soooo much of him and Dino the Greek. He was the first guy to ever get me drunk. When I was 11, we went shot for shot on some Raspberry Smirinoff. I won at 13 shots. He taught me how to throw a vicious punch and til this day, I'm still lethal. Nomoto would always have your back no matter what and he could charm anything walking with his smile. I'm grateful to have been given the chance to grow up with such an amazing group of friends. I miss my buddy.

David Takeshi Nomoto

4.29.1984 - 6.6.2006

That Guy

Before I begin, I'd like to clarify that this blog was written a loooong time ago. Kept it private for fear of exposing myself and others more than I should but, whatever. It came to mind today and thus, I'm reposting. And that's that.


Those who have dated have all dated them and all been attracted to them but we're not sure where they come from. Til this day, I have no idea but here's my thoughts...

I'm currently befriending this guy. And yes, for now, he seems to be becoming "that guy". Pretends to have interest, maybe gives you the best dick ever but, contrary to what you really sought after, he's just not that into you...This all started with a fake online posting. That's one of the things I do when I'm bored, I post a bunch of shit online just to see who responds. I have a few laughs and nothing more usually comes of it. Til a couple months ago.

I was shopping on the www and digressed over into posting like 20 ads for a chick looking for love or something along those lines... Got many replies; some funny, some desperate. One hot. So what do I do? I drunkenly reply. According to me, this guy was hot. So we talked; e-mailed almost every minute of every day for a couple weeks until the day we met.

Fast forward to now. I'm pretending to have feelings for this guy who seems to have little to no interest in me. He's got a lot of factors that attract me to him but shit doesn't seem to be happening like they normally would. This has never happened to me before. I did things "for him" that he's unaware of; like spend $30 on his drink at his show that, with good reason, he kinda acted like I wasn't at. Or buying new Tangas twice this month when usually, I only do that once a month. He doesn't seem to care to find out whats going on with me (keep in mind, I'm female, this may be all in my head).

Here's the deal, I have known others in this situation... But, I'm hot. I mean, call it what you like but I'm really hot. Smart, fun, nice rack, good personality. I'm good with people/kids, I'm an amazing cook AND I clean (lol); everyone seems to like me. It's just, for some reason, this guy does not react to me like most men do. Might end up working in my favor cause I'm not really looking for a relationship right now. However, I think females tend to end up with "that guy" because of our actions and expectations. We want too much and expect even more. Fairy Tales aren't real and yet, we're steady trying to create one. It sounds harsh but, in my opinion, we shouldn't think of most guys out there much more than what most of them are; selfish people who still haven't figured out what they want or when they've stumbled across something great. They'll come around but for now, it's not really happening.

I've never been a "feminist" type of girl but on this matter, to every female out there: you're beautiful! You're something to fight for. All women deserve to feel they are important and beautiful and often times, they're told otherwise or not told anything at all. I don't believe that's fair and I know its not right.

Don't settle for less than you should and don't think you're not as great as you are. If you play your cards right (meaning you believe you're #1 and let others know that you're #1) you can do and get anything you want. "Trust, I know them 20s real well..." It's all a matter of finding the one that says, "hey, this chick really is as awesome as she seems". People always say "if you love yourself first, others will love you too". In my opinion, you should allow others to love you and you'll realize how much YOU love you.

As for me, I'm still in the state of, "we'll see how far this goes..." but we all know that's not going to last long. Trust is important to me and if months later I still don't really know you, I'm not going to trust you... I have someone that loves me and I should let them, but won't for my own personal reasons. I know what I want and eventually, when I start looking, I'll find it...

I apologize if this comes off as demeaning to the male gender. Take it as a kick in the ass, if you will :)

Hope this all made sense. One love, JMB.

Quick Update...?

It's been a while since I've been on this thing. Haven't been near a computer in DAYS cause everything has been so effing busy. My apologies to those that care. Moving on.......


I've always been a very sociable person. Every time I go out anywhere; I hold a conversation with someone I don't know, I make at least 1 new friend, smile at every being walking past me on the street. But I must say, online social networking has taken all that to a whole other level.

In a rapid amount of time, I'm starting to meet and interact with people that I'd otherwise never have the chance to come across. Mainly on Twitter. Sooo many artist and music and greatness. Quite a few people that I instantly connected with and believe in their craft though we've never met. That excites me. The ability to share yourself with someone you don't really know and to open your world up to a more broad spectrum. The fact that there is new music to be heard and I'm carrying that venue in my back pocket... I just got chills.


Don't really know where this blog came from. Just thought I'd like to share. I love new people. And new music.


And I leave you with this: I'm teaching myself the art of shame. Here is the most crunk picture I have ever taken. Me and my Bestie on her birthday this past weekend. Tokyo Delves in NoHo. If you ever have the chance to go there, please do. It's fuckin ridic! Dancing on chairs, unlimited beer and sake, crazy Sushi Chefs dancing all over the place and hot guys working the door. On top of the fact that the venue looks like your Middle School's Final 8th grade Dance. So hot.






Loves this girl. Been ridin with me since the day I was born. Literally :)

Besitos.